All the things I keep meaning to say

by Lesley on July 1, 2014 · 3 comments

in motherhood

photo (11)

Owen’s first birthday is creeping closer and closer, so I’ve become a sentimental mess over here. I’m up late ordering photos for his party, working on his video montage, and thinking about all the highs and lows of the past year.

(Side note: I’m convinced the reason so many families have children spaced two years apart is because mamas get weepy around first birthdays and then…whoops…9 months later there’s another baby around! That’s why I posted a photo of myself, 9 months pregnant, eating cookies and a giant bag of Costco popcorn in bed. If anyone is wondering whether I’m ready for another pregnancy right now, the answer is NO.)

…Moving on…

I’m realizing, as I look back on my blog archives, that I haven’t written about Owen nearly as much as I wrote about Anna. This is partially because I’m so much busier since his birth, but more so because he’s been a much harder baby than she was. When Jonathan was sick I found it hard to publicly write about some of the tough stuff as it was happening. With Owen I’ve felt the same way. Some months I was in pure survival mode and all I wanted to write was, “THIS IS SO HARD AND I LOVE MY BABY BUT I DON’T LIKE HIM VERY MUCH RIGHT NOW AND PLEASE SEND OVER A MARGARITA AND PEOPLE MAGAZINE!” Also, when I tell people that being a mama is hard, I always worry they’ll think my baby isn’t sweet and darling and charming and a lovebug. He is ALL those things. He just likes to be held, a lot, and he simply cries if he’s not being held, a lot.

I guess all the fears and baby holding is why I’ve never written much about our sleep training trials (and eventual successes!) or how I quit breastfeeding a few months ago and why that’s okay. I have new philosophies on parenting, and survival ideas for new moms of two kiddos, and several favorite baby products. I just keep meaning to sit down and tell you about all these things but then sometime never seems to happen.

So, with the start of July and the beginning of Owen (and Anna’s!) birth month, I’m going to catch up what I’ve been wanting to say for the last year, but haven’t had the guts or the time to follow through on. I hope you’ll stick with me!

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