As I recently mentioned, I’m on a big e-books kick these days. E-books are nice for busy people because they’re short and to the point, with big takeaways.
An e-book I just finished that I think you’d like too is Balance Your Work and Family Life with Less Stress and More Fun, a Coach Me Quick Guide for Working Moms. The author, Jamee Tenzer, offers practical ideas for time management, self care, life balance, and parenting for moms of all kinds. (Despite the title’s emphasis for working moms I found the information to be extremely relevant for moms who don’t work outside the home.) There are close to 60 short takeaways, each with 5 minute coaching questions so you’re forced to think through how the advice can be applied. It’d be really effective to read the book over 60 days, covering a section each morning before breakfast.
Below you’ll find a free chapter from Jamee’s book so that you can have a better idea of what her book is all about. If you like what you read, she’s offering a free download of her book just this week, just for all of you. How cool is that? If you haven’t read an e-book before, here’s a free chance. (And, you don’t need an e-reader either. Her book can be downloaded straight to your computer.) Simply visit http://jameetenzer.com/ebook-
Do you have friends? Of course you do. So do I. Do you see your friends? Do you grab lunches, take walks, and chat on the phone?
If your answer to these questions is “yes,” then Bravo! However, if you’re like me, you may feel as if you don’t have time to cultivate and nurture friendships.The people that we meet when we are immersed in school or our first jobs are the ones that become true friends because we have the luxury of time. Time to hang out, time to share ups and downs and time to share experiences. And then, things change. We move or we have families and we get busy. We lose our ability to create friendships in this way, because we are missing an important ingredient: time.You may say, “So what? I have my husband, my kids and my job. I have colleagues and acquaintances. I talk to other mothers at my “Mommy and Me” class. Who has time for anything else?”
I struggle with that kind of thinking too. I tell myself I should be working or doing the grocery shopping. I should be spending that time with my kids! It feels frivolous and down deep, I don’t want to be “a lady who lunches.” My life has purpose after all! Or does it? If I am trying to live life as an expression of my values, then where are my friends?
Recently, I have begun to appreciate how important friendship is. I see that my parents have a group of friends that they have cultivated over years of spending time with each other; laughing, sharing experiences, commiserating, having fun and supporting each other. In other words, sharing their lives.
This has inspired me to take a look at this important part of my life that I have not been missing completely, but also has not been as rich as I would like it to be. I have begun to take time to cultivate new friendships, and to renew old friendships.
I have a group of women who I meet for breakfast every Thursday morning. It’s just one hour and we are not all able to make it each week. We came together because we have sons the same age, but this is no longer just about the kids. There is a consistency that has grown over the past four years and I am reaping real benefits now; a group of women who are true friends. I am forever grateful to the woman who invited me to join this very special group of moms.
I realize now, that I am building equity in a friendship account that will yield dividends forever.
1. Contact old friends. Who was your best-friend in college? Renew the friendship by email or Facebook and then plan a time to see each other.
2. Ask someone to lunch or take a walk. Maybe there is a mom at school, or a co- worker, that you think is interesting? Start a friendship with someone new.
3. If you are married or have a family, find other couples to socialize with. Ask them to dinner or invite their family over for a BBQ with your family.
4. Cultivate some kind of a group that meets regularly. Figure out an activity like walking, seeing movies or meeting for a meal and invite some people that you think would get along or have something in common. Make it a weekly or monthly event.
It will take time. Is it worth finding the time to do it now, for a benefit down the road? It was for me. Maybe it will be for you too.
Jamee Tenzer, PCC is dedicated to helping busy working women to create easier, and more balanced lives. She does this through her writing and also as a board certified Coach. Jamee founded her coaching practice in 2002 with the intention of working one on one with clients to create a personal plan designed to empower each woman to optimize their lives at work, home and play. As part of her commitment to supporting working moms, she has created a number of programs including: 7 Days To Achieve Peace For Working Moms – a FREE video series, Game Plan For Your Business – a comprehensive guide to beginning your own “kitchen table start up” and more! Contact Jamee for a complimentary phone session at firstname.lastname@example.org or check out her website at www.jameetenzer.com