Thoughts on Being a Woman

by Lesley on February 11, 2008 · 12 comments

in lessons learned,make-you-think,marriage

Hymn to a Good Wife: Read it here first.

I sat at the park today and read for awhile. First I read my new Glamour magazine so that I could learn how to apply lipstick, decide cardigans are hot this spring, and figure out how to dress for my body type. Very, very informative stuff. Suddenly I was interupted by the sound of a screaming child. A few feet away, a cute mommy walked slowly with child in each hand. Youngfouryearoldsmartypantys was telling mommy he did not want to leave the park and go home. Littletwoyearoldpreciouspigtails was slooooowwwwwlllllyyyy trying to keep up. Four year old’s voice begins to reach a high pitched scream, “I DON’T WANT TO GO HOME! I DON’T WANT TO GO HOME!” Soon, pigtails begins to follow suite. Mom picks up both precious raging sweethearts and walks as quickly as possible to waiting midsize utlity vehichle.

I begin to wonder: At what point will my maternal instincts and desires for children kick in? Will I wake up one day and think, “I’m ready to not be selfish anymore, wipe snotty noses, stay up all night, fix bottles, wipe bottoms, rock, feed, bathe, coo, read and hush? Will it be a gradual process that picks up speed as more and more of our friends have children? Or do you just dive in knowing what everyone says: the first moment you see them, nothing is the same?

I’ve been reading Proverbs 31. It overwhelms me, to be honest. (Glamour’s lipstick article was way less daunting).

I don’t like mornings very much. I fix cereal. I don’t like grocery shopping. I can’t sew. Sometimes, especially on Sundays, I have trouble facing tomorrow with a smile. I try to be kind, but I’m not always. How is this Proverbs 31 woman so perfect? At least I have a garden…

Do you think we as women are supposed to be all that Proverbs 31 says, or do you think it simply shows all the good qualities we should strive for?

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10 comments
Brenda Susan
Brenda Susan

O man I used to hate, hate, all those Mothers Day sermons in churches about the Proverbs 31 woman! I always went home depressed & overwhelmed. Then I realized that she (Miss Perfect Mom & Wifey in Proverbs) probably did not do all that stuff at THE SAME TIME! It was at different stages in her life. And I do not have to be her, I can be me in all my own glory, Ha! OK I feel better now that I got that said, hope it helps! Brenda

Lesley Miller
Lesley Miller

Yes Katie, I was almost a honeymoon baby...although I think this is the first time my mom has admitted it aloud to me. :) love it!also, I love that our mom's read each others blogs, and LOVE THEM. My mom just said to me, "I love that Katie Hardeman's blog. She is so funny." Last, Jonathan will be told about Heidi's comment tonight. I agree, he needs a new nudge in the right direction!

Katie
Katie

1- I didn't know you were practically a honeymoon baby!2- I don't even have a garden! I'm supposed to be watering Madalena's plants while she's in S.A., and they are all dying.3- I hope Jonathan reads Heidi's comment and realizes you need to a dog for parenting practice.4- I'll tell Heidi how to spell your name.5- My mom said to me other day, "I just love that Lesley. She really needs to write a book." and I replied, "She will!"

Ann Sebek
Ann Sebek

Yep, I read your birthday blog before this one - and I'll confirm feelings of motherhood once more. Yep, the second I saw you, motherly instincts were born. Were we ready for you before that time? Absolutely not - it was 10 months after our wedding, and your birth planned when it was supposed to be. It happens when it's supposed to. X0X0 Mom

Anna Quinlan
Anna Quinlan

Personally, I used my cutest crafting supplies to make a nice little checklist outlining all of the duties of "the Proverbs 31 woman," and I now I just make sure to do every one of those things, every single day! I encourage you to do the same! (kidding, obviously)About those babies... I'm kind of counting on a couple more kid-free years with you (unlike SOME of our friends, who are bound to be knocked up in no time!).

SportsFan's Daughter
SportsFan's Daughter

Personally, I used my cutest crafting supplies to make a nice little checklist outlining all of the duties of "the Proverbs 31 woman," and I now I just make sure to do every one of those things, every single day! I encourage you to do the same! (kidding, obviously)About those babies... I'm kind of counting on a couple more kid-free years with you (unlike SOME of our friends, who are bound to be knocked up in no time!).

*corinne
*corinne

i hate that it's impossible to be perfect! i feel ya on that one.i'm betting that passage is more of a guide, something we should aspire to, rather than something to compare ourselves with and use to point out wherever we fall short. for example, i believe i still truly love certain people in my life, even though that love can fall embarrassingly short of some of the qualities it should have according to 1 corinthians 13. it's written so we can work towards that, not to remind us that we are imperfectly human.

Paige Kearin
Paige Kearin

I identify with you so much. When will I be ready to blow up like a whale and become a milk machine?

heidiploog
heidiploog

oh by the way, i thought i was a blog stocker.... well i was talking to my mom this morning and she was talking about blogs and she said you know whose blog i really enjoy reading? leslies... i go oh well she wrote 3 new ones. she said" already read them"!!hahahaha

heidiploog
heidiploog

Leslie- I remember feeling the exact same way as you. I enjoyed my "me"time WAY too much. I think its important to have that period in your life where you enjoy your husband and enjoy the freedom of not having kids. I gradually felt more "motherly" instincts but honestly it wasn't until vander was here that they really really kicked in. now yeah i don't have as much me time, but it is so amazing that i wouldn't trade it for the world. We got a dog first to prepare us for parenthood:) it showed me how i needed to work on disciplining...